Book One: Avtandil's Quest (CH 30)
Waiting for the Sun
“The following day, I sent a letter to the ruler of the Khatavians. I wrote directly, as befitting my station, telling the King of Khataeti, ‘I, Amirbar of India, write to you. You are no doubt aware of King Pharsidan’s rule by God’s grace. Throughout our Kingdom, every hungry soul who is faithful is given his fill to eat. Likewise, whoever among them chooses disobedience can blame none but himself for what befalls him.’”
“‘Brother and Lord, by this letter, we command your presence. No one will be disappointed or embittered by your arrival, and we will welcome you with open arms. Yet should you refuse to come, we will instead come to you. We will not come like thieves in the night but boldly as befits our station. Truthfully, I say, you should come to us, for I would not have you spill your own blood.’”
“With my letter done, I sent it with a messenger and gave myself the freedom to rejoice. There was much merriment and jubilee in my court at this time, and I celebrated with those around me. The fires of my heart had been calmed, and I was no longer bitter towards Fate.
She gave me my heart’s desire. Yet, as night is opposite to the day, so too did my moods shift. I began to grow angry at the time lost between Nestan and me. I did not receive any sign from her and became like a madman, annoying everyone with my presence.”
“First, I thought to roam the fields and plains, but reason soothed my mind. Instead, I feasted with my comrades, though my desire for the woman I loved hobbled my joy. When I had first received news from my beloved, it came to me like a cup full to the brim. Yet, I now had no way to drink without the hand of another. Worse, no answer came from Khataeti, leaving me frustrated on all sides and pacing like a penned stallion in the confines of his stable. I was bitter indeed, at times cursing Fate, who I blessed just days before.”
“On one such day, I returned from the King’s palace to my chambers, consumed by thoughts of her. I read the letter she gave me again. When I remembered the moment I opened it, my unreasonable woe was kept at bay. On this day, though, an unexpected knock at my door interrupted me.”
“A servant whispered to me of Asmath’s man looking for me, and I brought him to a private room, where he gave me a sealed parchment. Though short of content, I could barely contain my excitement as I looked over the message. She, whose knife pierced me, commanded my presence. Joy lit my darkness as dawn upon a field of roses. At last, my chains loosened, and I followed her servant without speaking as we made our way to my heart’s desire.”
“Asmath met me when we entered the walled garden of the palace. It was every bit as beautiful as I remembered, with the trees silent save the occasional call of a nightingale. She smiled before saying, ‘It is a joy to meet you again, knowing my hand removed the thorn which before pained you. Come to the rose of your desire. She waits inside, unfaded and unwithered.’”
“She opened the way for me, pulling the heavy gilded curtains to the side as I stepped in. When I laid eyes upon Nestan, my heart stopped. She sat on a throne in a litter adorned with rubies, and she shone with such intensity the jewels around her appeared to be no more than cut glass. Looking into the inky black lakes of her eyes, I came to life once more.”
“She rested her gaze on my brow like the touch of a feather, and we stood there for a long time, neither of us speaking. An intimacy hung between us, and our hearts yearned to reach one another like roses towards the sun. For some reason, our words stopped, unspoken at the exact moment before dawn. Each waited for the other to light the sky and awaken the world, yet one could not move without the other.”
“After a time, she called Asmath to her side, who returned to me after a moment. She whispered into my ear, saying, ‘You must go from here. Your lady is left unable to speak.’ Once again, I was burned to soot, but I did as she asked. I stood, turning with a bow, and made my way out.”
“When I passed through the golden curtains of the entrance, and she within would not hear me, I turned to Asmath and said, ‘It is not long since your words of hope healed me. Yet now, my joy is scattered like sands to the wind. She and I said nothing to one another, so what is to become of me? I am more devastated now than before with the pain of parting.’”
“Ever my advisor, Asmath comforted me with her wisdom. She said, ‘Do not let the brand on your heart be seen as you leave. Instead, close the terrace of sorrow you occupy. Open the doors of joy in your spirit at seeing her, who your soul sings for. She is ashamed before you and behaves with the dignity expected of a princess.’”
“Those sweet words were music to my ears. I replied, ‘Sister, thank you for this balm you have put on my wound. I beg you, do not keep the nightingale within hidden from me. I will joyously receive any news of her. It will help extinguish these flames, lest they separate me from life.’”
“In this manner, we parted. I mounted my horse, the secret of my true purpose yet intact. To those without, we appeared as lovers, having shared our time together. As I made my way home, the sorrow of not speaking weighed heavily on me. When I came to my chambers, sleep eluded me. I lay in my bed, pain dulling the ruby of my cheeks to the bluest indigo. The black of night was preferable to me, for I did not want the dawn to shine on the misery I felt at separation from the rose of my heart.”
“In the morning, I woke from a short and unrestful sleep and learned my man was back from Khataeti. He carried two messages from their King, Ramaz. One spoken and the other written to ensure I would not mistake his answer. Though an unusual way to reply, I wanted to know what he would say to me.”
“My messenger repeated the words given to him, ‘Amirbar of India, it will be good for you to understand we are not cowards. Neither are our keeps and castles unfortified. I am not aware of who your monarch is for you speak with me in this way, but he is no Lord over my Kingdom.’”
“I sat down and considered what he said, wondering at the sort of man who would dare be so bold and insolent towards me. More, the disrespect he referred to King Pharsidan with was unbelievable. Curious to learn more, I turned my attention to the letter he sent. However, I feared it held little hope for the fool or the fate his words would bring down on him and his people.”